lovedintobeing

This past Sunday, I was blessed to have a sermon preached in honor of my ministry at Trinity Presbyterian Church. It was an amazing gift and I am so grateful to my pastor and friend, Dr. Dan Anderson-Little, who has been a constant source of creativity, energy and inspiration over the past seven years.

You can hear the sermon by clicking on the following link:

Keeping Time

I recently read a keynote address given by the preacher and hymn writer Thomas H. Troeger that delighted me. All too often in my work as a church musician I have met people who say that they are not musical. Perhaps they were told at an early age that they were unable to sing. Perhaps they have never had anyone take the time to help them connect their ears and their vocal chords. I believe that God loves to hear all of us sing, from the most skilled vocalist to the cooing baby, and love the way that Thomas Troeger invites us all to claim our own musicianship.

“I invite you to sit very still and listen to your breath. Become aware of your lungs expanding and contracting, expanding and contracting…Now each time you exhale, allow your voice to hum whatever fundamental pitch comes out of you…Increase the loudness…Decrease the loudness and let it fade away.

Next I would like you to simply find your pulse on your wrist, and sitting still, simply feel it beating again and again. There is no need to figure out the pulse rate. Just feel the constant beat…Now every time your heart beats, say “beat, beat, beat…” Fade to silence.

Finally, put together the beat, beat, beat and the hum.

You are a woodwind and a drum. You are a musical ensemble. Before you speak your first word as an infant, you are a woodwind instrument that plays twelve million breaths a year and a drum that beats 40 million times a year. From the moment of your birth you are a musical ensemble playing a perpetual concert through every moment of your life. When people tell me they are not musical, I conclude they must be dead.”

- from “Remembered Music Sounding: The Role of Church Music in Reclaiming Our Identity as Creatures”. The full address can be found in the May issue of The American Organist, pg. 84-86

There hasn’t been much blogging going on as there have been some major transitions happening in my life. In early March, I received a call to serve as the Minister of Music at the Park Avenue Christian Church in New York City. It’s an amazing opportunity to continue doing the kind of ministry that I have been about at Trinity for the past seven years - bringing music from the best of many traditions into worship, strengthening the congregation’s musical voice and finding new and exciting ways of bringing the Word to life through music and the Arts. Of course, the context and the particulars of the new congregation are different so there will be a time of discernment and settling in as I enter that new space. But I have had such a wonderful time getting to know my new pastor, the Rev. Alvin Jackson, and the creative juices and energy are already flowing. I am very excited about the new possibilities that this opens up for me musically, spiritually and personally. I have my house on the market, move to New York in late May and will begin my ministry at The Park on June 8.

As you might expect, these past few weeks have been a profound time of reflection for me. I mentioned in a farewell message to the Trinity congregation that I feel a bit like Janus, the two-faced god of Roman mythology, who looks into the future and the past simultaneously. It’s strange to assess the work you have done in one place, celebrate the growth and transformation that have occurred, but then begin planning and dreaming about a new place. There is a sense of loss and grief at leaving the wonderful people that I have known for seven years, but the Trinity congregation is genuinely excited for me and in so many conversations over this past week I have heard beautiful words of affirmation and support. We have accomplished much together, and though it is easy to assume that this is by virtue of our skills or resources, I believe that it is simply because God has been with us in it all, blessing our efforts and intentions.

Tonight I was reminded of that in a powerful way. We had a rehearsal for the Trinity Gospel Choir which will sing in worship next week. This ensemble was a new venture for us this year - a way to be more intentional about learning music from the sacred African-American tradition. Trinity is a largely white church and music from the African-American tradition is not something that always comes easily or naturally to all of us. By that, I mean we sometimes struggle with challenging, syncopated rhythms, find it scary to rely on our ears rather than a piece of music, or to enjoy the sense of bodily freedom and spontaneity that can be such a beautiful part of music-making in the black church. Our intentions to perform music from this tradition were certainly genuine but the results have not always have the sort of authenticity that you would find if you were worshiping in a church where Gospel music was the lingua franca. But try we did, and last May, our choirs had a rare opportunity to partner with an African-American collegiate chorus, the Citywide Gospel Ministries, performing a piece by the composer, Fred Onovwerosuoke. During that time we forged a very special bond with the group. We ate together, we sang together, we prayed together - and as a result we found such a powerful sense of unity in Christ. This process didn’t happen overnight but it took time, grace and tenacity. And the gifts that we received in the process were more than just musical. They helped us to sing from the heart, to let our sometimes stiff hips and shoulders sway to the beat and to begin to let go of our fears about getting it “right”.

Tonight, four members of the Citywide choir came to rehearsal and again I was reminded of the rich blessings that they have brought to us. Not only did they bring strong, expressive voices and a passion for music, but they brought loving encouragement about the style of the music, freedom to express ourselves (when we sing “lift our hands to Jesus” we can actually DO that!!) and hearts full of love for God. Several times in the rehearsal I was caught up in the spirit of the music and amazed at the energy, the quality of the sound, and the upward focus of the music. And as we concluded in a circle for prayer, I was profoundly grateful that God brought them into our lives.

Our little Gospel Choir is never going to rival the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir but that’s not the point. What matters is that, as we have welcomed the gifts and spirit of others, they have changed us profoundly, opening us to new ways of expressing our heartfelt prayer and praise to the God who is worthy of all our praise. I am reminded that music in the church is not primarily about a style, an instrument, the size or skill of the choir, or even the personality of the musician who is directing. Don’t get me wrong, a fine pipe organ or piano, a strong choir and able leadership are all to be celebrated. But in worship we are invited to respond to God with our own voices, as strong or as weak as we feel they are, and return to God just a small portion of the love, goodness and blessing that has been so generously given to us! All of worship - all of life- is an Offertory: a time to remember that God is the source of all that is and that we are called to live in humble dependence and trust.